A brief glossary of Brexit



‘Brexit’ – formally departing the European single market.

‘Soft Brexit’ – formally departing the European single market.

‘Hard Brexit’ – formally departing the European single market, along with the customs union.

‘Shambolic Brexit’ – see ‘Brexit’.

‘Take back control’ – cede control of economic and social policy from a democratically accountable parliament to an unaccountable series of non-governmental organisations.


‘WTO’ – World Trade Organisation: oversees the global rules of trade between nations.

‘Tariff’ – a tax or duty, applied to goods which are imported or exported.

‘Referendum’ – a vote which presents the electorate with a binary choice of two ill-defined options.

‘Advisory referendum’ – a poorly-drafted bill.

‘Will of the people’ – the evenly split outcome of a public vote.

‘Only voted for by a minority of the overall public’ – voted for by a majority of the eligible electorate.


Unpatriotic Rain


‘Constitution’ – the framework of law which British governments are beholden to.

‘Prosecco’ – a moderately priced wine imported from Italy.

‘Trade with the world’ – lose access to Britain’s primary export market.

‘Opinion poll’ – a device used by newspapers to reinforce their own political messages, by suggesting they enjoy wide-spread public support. Antonym: quantitative data/field research.

‘The elite’ – somebody who is educated beyond high-school level, and holds progressive political views.

‘Metropolitan elite’ – somebody who lives in a city, e.g. London.


‘Red-tape’ – employment protections and environmental safeguards.

‘Brussels’ – a) the capital of Belgium b) one site of the European Parliament.

‘Single market’ – an international economy, which facilitates free-trade between EU member-states.

‘Freedom of movement’ – the ability of EU citizens to move around other European Union member states as and when required by economic necessity.

‘EU citizen’ – person holding the nationality of a member state of the EU, such as Britain.

‘Migrant’ – a) somebody who works in a foreign country b) somebody who lives in a foreign country.

‘Health tourist’ – somebody from overseas who works in Britain, and requires medical treatment during their stay.


‘Article 50’ – the formal declaration for departing the European Union.

‘Accepting the outcome of the EU referendum, but opposing Article 50’ – refusing to accept the outcome of the EU referendum.

‘Customs union’ – a group of states which have made an agreement to charge the same import duties as each other; and are committed to free trade amongst themselves.

‘Open borders’ – a stretch of water which surrounds the British isles; primarily comprising the English channel, the North Sea, and the Atlantic ocean.

‘Uncontrolled borders’ – national borders which are subject to strict controls.

‘The establishment’ – either a) the major offices of state, such as Parliament or b) minor newspaper columnists who criticise conservative policies.


‘Patriotic duty’ – ignoring the interests of British people in favour of enhancing the profit-margins of multinational corporations.

‘Diversity’ – people from different ethnic groups, who live and work in the same environs.

‘Traitor’ – a) somebody who puts the freedom and prosperity of the general public before the profit-margins of select business interests b) somebody who is opposed to white supremacism.

‘Breaking point’ – an unwillingness to provide temporary accommodation to a small number of refugees, who have fled warzones created in large part by Britain’s government.

‘£350 million’ – a sum of money promised, variously, to the National Health Service, scientific research, and agriculture.

‘Aspirational pledge’ – a false promise.


‘Democratic will of the people’ – the expedient outcome of a vote.

‘Betrayal of the people’ – the inexpedient outcome of a vote.

‘Won’ – the side of a campaign which successfully misled the greatest number of people.

‘Supreme court’ – final court of appeal in civil cases throughout the UK, and criminal cases throughout Britain.

‘Project Fear’ – forewarnings of future financial problems, issued by economists prior to a vote of national significance.


‘Market’ – area of commerce.

‘Market forces’ – governments paying private companies to manage public services, such as hospitals and train networks.

‘Private finance initiatives’ – governments using public finance to compensate for the inept management of public services by private companies.

‘Bespoke deal’ – an economically impossible trade agreement, which would favour Britain to the detriment of all other EU countries.

‘Transitional arrangement’ – a situation whereby each EU state loses access to one market, while Britain loses access to twenty seven markets.

‘Economic hit’ – wholesale departure of foreign investment from Britain; consequently generating mass unemployment.



‘Men of the people’ – lobbyists for private venture capital firms, elected to a parliament.

‘Authentic working class voice’ – somebody who espouses chauvinistic viewpoints.

‘Islington radical’ – a social democratic politician who represents one of the poorest boroughs in Britain.

‘Expert’ – somebody who possesses accredited knowledge of a complex subject.

‘Forced by Europe’ – opting to undertake a damaging and fruitless exercise, of your own volition, against all advice to the contrary.