Some Right-Thinking Thoughts On The Rise Of The Front National

by richardhutton

People objecting to the negativity aimed at Marine Le Pen and the Front National are quite right, of course. Why, Ms Le Pen is merely voicing simple commonsense.

I am not a eurosceptic – I am merely a concerned person, who believes that continued membership of the European Union will destroy all that we hold dear. I am not normally one to take an interest in political matters; but one thing very often leads to another, and a line needs to be drawn – for the sake of common decency.

France is no longer the country I grew up in. Admittedly I spent my formative years in Switzerland, but that is beside the point. Modern France is now a truly bewildering place – all thanks to the EU. To take but one example, due to Brussels-imposed regulations, you can no longer say ‘Christmas’ in polite company: all because Europeans are unwilling to admit that God is really French. Nobody consulted the public on this.

The solution is at hand, however. What naysayers need to appreciate is that only the Front National offers France a five-point programme, rooted in sound right-thinking, which will put the ‘the’ back into France:

1) A French First policy – all greengrocers will be required to put native-grown fruit and vegetables at the forefront of their shelves. Any foodstuffs which contain traces of prayer will be placed firmly at the back. A Le Pen government will ensure that France’s children learn to value the merits of an honest French potato.

2) Controlled borders – every single A4 sheet of paper used in any French offices throughout the land, will have fixed margin spaces. No ifs; no buts.

3) A French Citizenship Test – a Le Pen government will test whether people are genuinely French, through subjecting all people to the mandatory scientific measurement of their knees and elbows.

4) Traditional French values – a Le Pen government will ensure that all public buildings contain only indigenous chairs and tables: ones with good solid, wooden legs; not seductive foreign types, whose elegant designs could tempt the virtue of impressionable youths.

5) Commonsense – a Le Pen government will widen the gauges of all French rail-tracks, so that cattle may be lined up sideways on train carriages.

I’m not an economist, but my gut tells me that this would work. And not before time. What people living in poverty need is not effective government, after all, but the iron-fist of compassionate fascism.