Electoral Diary Of Reginald Horace – 12th April

by richardhutton

The first week of my campaign drew to a successful close today. Mrs Corinne Stockheath visited; having taken the train up from Surrey. Spent the entire afternoon taking tea with Mrs Horace. On such occasions, I am generally given to fixing household objects outdoors, even when – strictly speaking – they do not require work. Unfortunately, my back has temporarily given out, and I was unable to discrete myself as I wished; so, instead, I busied myself with the right-thinking Sunday news-publications.

Naturally, I paid little attention to what was being discussed between the two women by and by; but I really must commend Mrs Stockheath for delivering a well-aimed riposte to the work-shy layabout who lives next door to her; whose excuse, predictably enough, when asked about not working was some feeble nonsense about having had several strokes, and a mild heart attack during the course of the previous year. It didn’t stop him being out and about, suffice to say. The anecdote revealed much about modern morality. This has been reaffirmed time and time again by experts at the very newspapers I was perusing, of course.

I have certainly never been ill myself – because I had more sense. Besides, if I did spend time on a recovery ward of one kind or another, it has no bearing on the present. (I’ve rubbed against all sorts, in my time. I know a very good joke about the ‘Green Croots Of Recovery’ – but I won’t divulge the details. A man’s battles with the bottle are a private concern). When the conversation between the two women turned to issues best left to women, I affected not to understand their meaning. A touch of fresh air was necessary, so despite my ailment, I decided to take a short walk.